Change

Change…it occurs all around us. It happens every day, every moment of every day, with or without us.

But change sometimes causes sadness and that’s what happened lately.

When you blog, it becomes part of you. When you start a blog for a specific reason and you have to give up that blog before it’s time, you almost have to mourn for that blog.

My original blog (the babypaige blog) was originally started for my daughter while she was still in utero. It was a series of letters to her, a blog that I would eventually turn over to her. It morphed into a family-update blog and finally became a place for me to write. I had MAYBE one visitor a week and would go months with a flat line on my stats. I felt like I could open up.

So when I had to shut it down, I cried. It was a part of me, even though it had only been in exsistence for about a year. I didn’t want to shut it down, but I needed to, to ensure that the parties harassing me wouldn’t be given anymore amunition to shoot back at me. I couldn’t deal seeing the stats pop up showing me that they were checking on my blog over 50(!) times a day. I couldn’t stand the awful comments they left that I just kept denying.

These people weren’t just random people trying to cause trouble, they were my MIL and her friends. Which makes the betrayal hurt even more. The e-mails and threats had to stop at some point and the only way I could think to stop it was to completely and totally shut them down.

But sometimes, change is good. I’m not advertising this blog anywhere and while I leave my website when I leave comments (okay, so I’ll start doing that in a few days), I’m not going out of my way to attract tons of visitors.

Change is giving me a new start, so I can really use this to document our life. If Paige wants to blog when she’s old enough, she can set up her own place. But this will be my blog from now on.

My place to vent, to discuss, to hope, to dream, to love.

Change is good.

(PS. How many times can I say blog in one post? Good grief!)